The Right Response to Wrong Advice on Suffering

Last week, I tried to emphasize the good side of Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar's visit with Job. With that said, I endeavored Sunday to show the other side of the friends. Many times what we think in our hearts will be revealed through our mouth. Warren Wiersbe said, "How sad it is when people who share ministry end up creating misery".

These three friends reveal an idea that still exists in today's society; Suffering must be an indication of sin, however the Christian life is a call to glory through a life of suffering. We often treat suffering as if it's to be avoided at all costs, yet it's often the best display of a life transformed by Christ.

Some flowers must be broken or bruised before they emit any fragrance. What do you smell like? Have you allowed God to produce that sweet fragrance through you in your suffering that would be attractive to others who are going through, or are you too busy not claiming it and not speaking it because you think you can undo the will of God?

Eliphaz believed that suffering is a sign that you are getting what you deserve. That spirit still exists in the church. Lost your job, wife left, children in jail, just getting what you deserve. Bildad is the forerunner of the prosperity theology movement found on many television ministries.

If you obey you will be blessed, those in God's will enjoy great prosperity and good health but if you suffer you are out of God's will because God wants everyone well. This is bad theology. God does not want everyone well. Paul asked three times for God to remove his "thorn" and God said No, my grace is sufficient. Jesus asked, "Father if you are willing, remove this cup from me, but nevertheless not my will but yours be done.

Zophar's entire argument throughout this discussion turned debate into a dispute can be summed up like this, "What did you do? Whatcha do? You had to do something! Tell me! What happened? Sounds like church peopele I know, not Macedonia, just ones I know. They don't come around to be a blessing, they come to try and find out the business so they can broadcast the news.

In spite of this prevailing belief that suffering is a result of sin and God's judgment on your life. Job lifts a right response in the middle of such bad advice on suffering. Dr. Quinton E. Hammonds, Pastor of the Antioch Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama suggests that we miss great daily living because we reserve some passages in the Bible just for the dying.

Job 14 is an all-time favorite for Old Testament readings at funeral services. It ranks up there with the 23rd Psalm, and the 90th Psalm, but Job 14 gives us daily insight for practical living today as well as hope for tomorrow.

I. Suffering is Normal vs. 1
a. Who--Man
b. When-at birth
c. How Long- few days

II. Suffering is Natural vs. 2-6
a. The Flower Testifies
b. The Shadow leaves a Trace
c. The Hired Hand shows his Toil

III. Suffering is Needful vs. 7-13
a. Hope of Revival
b. Hope of Reproduction
c. Hope of Resurrection

IV. Suffering is Numbered vs. 14
a. appointed- it is temporary
b. anticipated- it is transforming

What do your friends look like?

What is a friend? How do they look? Act? Behave? Do I have real friends or situational sidekicks? I am convinced that one of the most misunderstood, misapplied and misused terms in the English vocabulary is the term "friend". Everyone has them but do we really know what a friend is?

A British publication once offered a prize for the best definition of a friend, They received thousands of entries but the definition that won the contest was this: A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out". This is a good description of Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar, they came in when the whole world had gone out. While I will deal with the negative side of their visit at another time, there is something positive to be learned from their visit.

Job 2:11 ESV starts out by saying NOW,! What has happened? It's real simple: Job has lost 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 500 yokes of oxen, 500 donkeys, 7 boys and 3 girls, all his workers are dead except 4, NOW, his wife has said, "Curse God and Die", NOW, he has ulcers, Itching, Disfiguration, no appetite, Depression, Sores, Scabs and worms living in the sores, it's hard to breath, Skin is blackening, Foul Breath, Loss of weight, Fever, Diarrhea, Delusions and he is living in constant pain, NOW. Physically he is in agony, Emotionally he is in anguish, Spiritually he feels abandoned, Financially he is in arrears, Culturally, he is ashamed, NOW they show up.

I said that because it is easy to be a friend to someone on a good day, when they have money, a job, no death, disappointment or drama has come but can you be there for them on the dark days?

I. They made an Intentional Appointment VS. 11
a. Look at their Conversation
b. Look at their Destination
Their meeting was not accidental, it was purposeful. It was pre-arranged, pre-discussed. They decided in advance to show up, Notice they did not run away from their friend, but they ran towards him. Real friends don't need an invitation, they just need an opportunity. When Mary and Martha sent word to Jesus that Lazarus was sick, they never said, come now, or come quickly, all they said was, the one you love is very sick. Love doesn't need an invitation, just an opportunity.

II. They Displayed An Invaluable Attitude--VS 12.
a. Look at their Character
1. screamed
2. wept
3. tore robes
4. sprinkled dust
b. Look at their Conduct
1. Console- shake head, rock body back and forth, shared grief
2. Comfort- attempt to ease deepest pain caused by tragedy.

III. They Made an Inescapable Assessment
a. The Power of Presence-(Showed up)
b. The Power of Position-( Gave up titles-sat down in trash)
c. The Power of Peace- (Shut up)

As usual, I have written too much so I leave you on this, William E. Hulme in his Pastoral Discourse book on Job entitled Dialogue in Despair says among other things in his treatment of Job, "There are certain situations where words are useless but God has given us "The sacrament of silence where He teaches us the Power of Presence and Peace".

Jackie Robinson was the first African-American to play major league baseball. While breaking baseball's color barrier, he faced jeering crowds in every stadium. While playing one day in his home stadium in Brooklyn, he committed an error. His own fans began to ridicule him. He stood at second base, humiliated, while the fans booed, jeered and threw racial insults.

"Pee Wee" Reese a shortstop on the team came over and stood next to Jackie. He then put his arm around Jackie and faced the crowd. The fans grew quiet, the booing stopped, the jeers ceased and the insults evaporated. Jackie Robinson would later say that arm around my shoulder saved his career.

When someone is hurting, they don't need a speech, they need an arm, they need a shoulder, they need a place where they can run to. In case you have not been able to find a friend to lean on, run to, an arm to hold, there is not a friend like the lowly Jesus, No not one, What a friend we have in Jesus, all of our sins and grieves to bear, what a privilege it is to carry everything to God in prayer.

Owens