People who talk out of both sides of their mouths

Have you ever known a person who agreed with whomever he was talking to at the moment? When he was with you, he agreed with you. But when he was with someone else who had a different opinion, he agreed with that person. Did that person's opinion fluctuate so quickly that it nearly shocked you?

It is very difficult to build trust with a person like this because you never know if he is really with you, or if he's just agreeing with you to your face until he can turn around and disagree with you behind your back. This type of person's lack of integrity makes it difficult to build a significant relationship with him. The apostle Paul called this kind of person "double-tongued" (1 Timothy 3:8).

The Greek word for "double-tongued" is the word dilogos, which is a compound of the words di and logos. The word di means two, and the word logos means words. When compounded together, these two words form the word dilogos, which could be literally translated two-worded. It is the picture of a man or woman who says one thing to one person but a different thing to the next. In other words, people like this are inconsistent in what they tell others. They are so wishy-washy that their opinion is constantly fluctuating, depending on whom they are speaking to at the moment.

This is usually an indication that this person is a people-pleaser. Because he wants everyone to like him, he agrees with whomever he is with at the moment. This is a serious character flaw. In fact, First Timothy 3:8 forbids us from giving this kind of person any prominent place of leadership in the ministry. It is also a principle that should be taken into consideration when looking for a prospective leader in any church, business, or organization.

Truthfulness is necessary so trust can be built between leaders and followers. It is compulsory in marriages, in friendships, and in relationships between employers and employees or between a pastor and his leaders. If a long-term relationship is to be built, trust is not optional—it is essential.

If there is a person in your church, business, or organization who is constantly changing what he says depending on who he is with at the moment, I urge you not to elevate this person into a leadership role. That person doesn't demonstrate the character that is required in leaders.

But what if you are the leader, pastor, or employer, and you have someone working under your authority who is constantly switching what he says, depending on whom he is talking to? In that case, take Paul's words to heart. Don't promote that person to a higher level of responsibility until this habit has been broken. Don't lay hands on a person who is double-tongued!

Sparkling Gems from the Greek.