Thank you God for 42 years of Life

Lord, I want to thank you for allowing me to see 42 years of life. This past year has been difficult. I witnessed many preachers/pastors that I respected go home to be with you. Many of those preachers lived better lives by nature than I do by practice. They were some of the nation's best preachers and yet I remain, I am grateful and yet don't understand.

I buried so many young people this past year who died senseless deaths due to violence fed by revenge, misplaced testosterone, lack of constructive things to do and a society who by and large ignored them, and yet I remain, I am grateful and yet don't understand.

I lost a Pastor who no one will understand what our "real" relationship was like. There is not a "spiritual son" he produced that was or will be any more like him "spiritually" then me, proud and disappointed, blessed and cursed me, loved and disliked what he produced, and yet he was my father, in spite of outsiders beliefs.......September 10,201l,,,,,,,,,,,some things went to the grave and in the grave they will remain, and yet I remain, grateful but still don't understand.

Lord, thank you for allowing me to pastor the Macedonia Church family and celebrating my 4th year. Thank you for the people you have sent my way to bless me and thank you for the people you wouldn't remove who have taught me how to pray.

Thank you for the deacons who always have to have their voice heard but never want their actions seen. Thank you for the trustees that have decided to be part of the solution instead of perpetuating the problem. Thank you for the ministry workers who tirelessly have given their best efforts to you, many times under paid under appreciated and largely ignored by the overall Church body who just assume that's what is supposed to be done.

Thank you for the Pastors who have embraced me, in the city and away, when so much drama surrounded my name this past year with the rumors circulating everywhere SPREAD MAINLY BY OTHER PASTORS, thank you for those Pastors in this city and state that kept me afloat. Thank you for Pastor K.D.Witherspoon, Andre A. McGhee, H. Gregory Haygood, L. Dalton Hall, President Issac Culver, Jr., Moderator Marion J. Johnson, Jr.,

Lord, thank you for those Pastors who have heard me preach or teach and then for whatever reason still invite me to come back and preach again, I am grateful but don't understand. Thank you for those Pastors that have invested in my life from the outset, thank you for Pastors EJ Tyson, Teron Gaddis and Dr. JA Reed Jr.,

Lord thank you for my children, Rachael, LaBraia, Raven. How they love me unconditionally is amazing to me, how gifted and talented they are is a testimony to the providence of God, How well adjusted they are in spite of what they have had to go through is proof of God's keeping power.

Lord thank you that a young man I inherited through a now failed marriage would think enough of me to tell his mom and father, he wanted to go and live with his dad. I don't understand but yet I am grateful.

Too much on my mind, too many tears starting to flow but Lord thank you for grace and mercy. That's a good place to close, all this time I have had grace and mercy. GM left me but grace and mercy didn't, people left me but grace and mercy didn't, marriage failed and people rejected me but grace and mercy didn't leave me, even when I felt like I was all alone in South Bend, I still had grace and mercy.....................................................

Lord, thank you for 42 years of life, I truly don't understand but I am grateful.

Owens

I turned 40 years old and I am 2 years old!!

I praise God for allowing me to see another birthday as I was blessed on May 31st to become a 40 year old man. While I am sure the turning of another decade means something, I am just grateful to be alive another day and to see another year. I thank everyone for the cards and calls. May God bless you and keep you is my prayer.

The one thing I have learned in becoming older is that when I was younger, youth shook off lots of things. If I woke up with a pain or if while working something didn't feel right, you just shook it off. Arm doesn't feel right, just shake it till it feels better; leg isn't responding just shake it till it becomes responsive.

The older I am becoming I realize that there are some pains that you can't shake off anymore, in fact shaking it makes it worse, so you learn to live with it. God sends subtle reminders to remind us to pause, stop, slow down but in youth we ignore them. Becoming older is starting to teach me to read the signs. When the third base coach sends you home, go home but when he gives you the hold sign, you must hold.

I said all of this because I also turned TWO YEARS OLD. I am celebrating my Second Year Anniversary as the Pastor of the Macedonia Missionary Baptist Church. I am grateful for the blessing that God gave me through this wonderful church. They have loved me, prayed for me, been patient with me, dealt with me and put up with me!

The same way I discovered in my personal life that its better to leave some things alone, I am learning that in my Pastoral Ministry. I am not a Laissez Faire pastor; letting people do what they want to do, but I am becoming clear that if God's Word doesn't change them, I won't be able to change them.

Sometimes as young ministers we believe we can fix people or change mindsets or "shake people into doing right" but we can't fix anyone. If God can't fix it, it can't be fixed! If God's Word doesn't shake it, it can't be shook! Dr. Fletcher McAfee, Pastor of the Mt Olive Baptist Church in Niles Michigan was our guest preacher on last night.

I always need an older preacher to preach, nothing against my brethren but I need someone who has been there and done that. No Hermeneutical Hurdles, No linguistic languages, No Ecclesiastical End-Arounds, just old-school preaching and Pastor McAfee killed me graveyard dead from Deuteronomy 3:23-27, where basically he reminded me that the people don't belong to me, they belong to God and we must be careful what we say and how we treat God's people.

Because of disobedience to God, Moses was able to see the blessing but not share in the blessing. GRAVEYARD DEAD!!! Moses saw the promised land but didn't get to enter because he allowed his frustration with the people(Which didn't belong to him in the first place) to lead him into anger and ultimately disobey God's orders thereby losing the blessing he struggled forty years in an attempt to obtain.

Some things you don't shake, you just leave it alone. You can actually make it worse by shaking it. When I was younger, I could shake it off, now a little older, shaking it makes it worse and the pain last longer, just leave it alone. Don't miss your blessing fighting with the people and disobeying God. Give the people to the God who created them in the first place. I don't want to see it, I want to share in it.

Good First night of Appreciation,

Owens

Nine years old, Happy Birthday Rachael

Happy Birthday Rachael! I can't believe you are nine years old.?! What happened? I have been trying hard to keep you little but you refuse to do it. I guess I should have seen it coming as you were always in a hurry. Nosy from day one, head moving trying to see everything, walking too early, running off at the mouth even when words were not formed yet but Rachael is telling all the business. My pretty girl is nine years old.

There are many things I want to tell you but Daddy is a cry baby and I have been trying and retyping this for a week now because I keep crying as I remember the first time I held you, saw your eyes, held your hand, watched you give your life to the Lord, baptized you... I love you so much.

For some reason, this is harder for me than in years past so in order for me to make it through this blog, I am turning back to what has kept me all these years. I know I tell you Daddy can do anything, Daddy's are supermen and invincible but that is not true. I am still just as scared today I may mess up as I was the first time your mother left me alone with you while she ran to the store. Your eyes were big and mine were bigger.

There will be times as you grow up that you won't know what to do but God left us a promise that says, "I Can Do ALL Things Through Christ Which Strengthens Me"

The World will tell you that YOU CAN'T, That is called Pessimism!

What does that mean? It is a negative spirit or outlook, someone always telling you that you can't do this or you won't do that. You may hear that from a teacher, a church member, even a family member but there is nothing you can not do. You can graduate from High school, You can attend college, you can and will go to Georgetown(ok my dream) you can be successful. You can wait until marriage to have children, you can live drug-free, NEVER LET ANYONE TELL YOU WHAT YOU CAN'T DO!

This is the language of I CAN--That is called Optimism

I am scared all the time but I still say I can. The first time I sat down with you and we practiced braiding hair on the bratz dolls I said I can't learn this, but you said Daddy you can do all things... and I learned. Its funny how many church people bother you on Sunday and say. Who did your hair, it's so cute, and you say, MY DADDY, I TAUGHT HIM. I wasn't good in Texas with hair but I didn't give up and I became better. NEVER GIVE UP. Things may not always come easy or on your first try but NEVER GIVE UP, always tell yourself I CAN.

To prevent you from becoming arrogant, you need a Mechanism--Through Christ.

Optimism without a Mechanism is nothing more than wishful thinking. You need help. Rachael, Jesus is your help. By yourself you can do nothing, through Christ you can do anything. Through Christ, HE gives you strength. That means Jesus imparts, infuses strength into you daily, especially for your weak moments.

I know age 9 seemed so traumatic for you. We will laugh later because 16, 18, 21, 30, 40, they are all coming and it will be hard, but God has given you a way to make it, it is THROUGH CHRIST JESUS, HE IS YOUR MECHANISM. Use Him, Trust Him, Love Him, Rely on Him.

I love you, Rachael Simone, forgive me in advance for the tears, lol

Daddy

Happy Birthday Raven

October 27th, 2004, God gave me a very special present. I had already been blessed with two angels in Rachael Simone and LaBraia Simone but God decided I needed another angel so he gave me a little girl named Raven Elisabeth Simone Owens.

Raven is my baby girl and she knows and acts like it. She is a diva and wears the title well. I love you Raven with my whole heart and it will be my joy to one day see you accept Jesus as your personal savior. Every time you hug and kiss me and say I love you daddy, I melt more and more. The Lord has a sense of humor and since Rachael was the perfect blend of two parents and I marked LaBraia up, so your mom marked you up.

In spite of all the rumors and gossip, no woman will ever get close to the Pastor because Raven stands guard every church service at my leg looking up as to suggest, he is taken, MOVE ON. My relationship with you is different than your sisters. I love you equally but differently. As you get older and ask the "WHY QUESTIONS" that I asked my parents about their divorce, I want you to know that it wasn't your fault.

You came from love, the love of God which looks beyond our faults and sees our need. You weren't an accident or a mistake, you were and still are a gift from God. I love you Baby girl. Have fun with you mom and I will see you in a week when we fly back home. Happy Birthday Angel,

Daddy